Changes

Since I came back home my mind has has been filled with thoughts about everything. Mostly about why the things that have happened to me were the most important. I sat down with myself and began to think, " what would I be like if the events in my life had not happen to me?". What If I hadn't met him or her? What if did or didn't do that, how different would my life had been? The events in my life (although some unfortunate ) have shaped me. I remember a science fiction term that always made the most sense when I thought about something like this. The Butterfly Effect, mostly used when talking about time travel. When going back in time travelers had to make sure that they were very careful not to mess up anything in the past. "Something as simple as stepping on a butterfly could change the course of time". A butterfly could change the course of time just as anything else. If one thing was different in my life how different would it be? Well if I hadn't move I would still be in this same place with the same friends. Maybe I would have been happier than I am now.  When I was 10 years old I was a very happy kid I had a three best friends. A lot of people liked me in my small town. I guess I was  occasionally a annoyance but with time I would have eventually grown out of that.  I would still have the same friends (I know that because they're still going strong ever since I left). I went to the hospital because I was depressed about moving so no moving, no depression, no hospital. It sounds perfect and when I used to think about it that way I would wish for some type of Time Machine. I was so angry with the people who moved me around so many times against my will. I didn't ask to be here, I could've stayed where I was. I cried about it a lot until however I had some time to myself and began to think. Those people who taught me so much about life don't all live in the same place. I had to leave in order to meet them you see. When I came back home I was informed nothing had changed. I couldn't believe it that in 7 years  that my home hadn't  made any progress like myself has. Though it was right not a single thing was different.  The place looked,felt, and smelt the same. The people were different my friends from years ago.  Though no one is the same at 10 as they are at 17. They weren't the same people I knew in school. They were not people I wanted to be friends with anymore. They all were all just alike and I was nothing like them. If I would have stayed maybe I would have been like them. When I came back and began to see that I hadn't left I wouldn't have met those friends. The ones who changed the way I see life. I've never been outside the country but I've met people from different ones. They took me with me them when they told me their stories about their lives. Hearing about others experiences changed the way I saw mine. What their mistakes were and how they wanted to change them. My life was hard though theirs seemed a lot harder. I wouldn't have made it it if I were them,though they did so I should. The ones who were my best of friends who taught me about things I didn't know in life. Who kept me inspired, who loved me, who laughed with me, who spoke to my heart and made me feel special. Who kept my mind open and my heart wide. Who taught me what it feels to love and lose someone.  It never gets easier to say goodbye because it's never easy to change. Although it's very hard to change, we need it.